Have you ever encountered someone in a relationship who had a really low self-image? And then you offered to help them improve it, and you tried, but then later when the relationship went belly-up they tried to say you were hurting them because you weren't accepting them just as they were?
Maybe it's just me, but isn't it a bit whackadoo to give someone permission to help them, but then turn around later and say that their help was hurting them? Isn't it, in fact, THEIR fault for not just saying, from the beginning, "I just don't want help and I like myself just like I am" if they were truly more comfortable with that?
I mean, when someone tries to help you be better in some way, they're doing it because they care, NOT because they're trying to hurt you. But if it does hurt you by them even trying to help you, isn't it YOUR responsibility to grow a backbone, stand up to them, and tell them how you really feel BEFORE your feelings escalate out of control and go in a downwards spiral?
I just don't get some people.
-If you don't want help, DON'T accept it.
-Communicate
-And don't chew the hand off of someone in the end if that hand never knew it was doing something wrong because you never told it that it was, and ESPECIALLY if you asked for it in the first place. Believe me, in nine times out of ten it was just trying to help.
Sheesh. Some people need a serious wake-up call. Folks, if someone tries to help you and you don't want it, you either let them know that asap or you accept it, but you don't just put up with it if that's not what you want. Because THEN it becomes YOUR fault for not speaking up and holding your ground.
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